Story time?

Ward says that I have been presented an opportunity to impact many women who will face this decision.

What the heck is he talking about? Well, he’s talking about an email I received this morning from one of the gals that are coordinating the American Cancer Society’s “Making Strides Against Breast Cancer” walk that is taking place the Saturday before my surgery.

Just to catch anybody up on our schedule the next few weeks…..Ward & I are finally getting married in 9 days (YAY!), on October 22. We’re saying goodbye to the kids and work for a week so we can have some much needed R&R and we’ll return on Friday, October 28^th. We were originally going to come back on Saturday, but a good friend had sent me info about this walk. Ward & I decided that it was an opportunity that we couldn’t miss. An empowering walk with sister fighters & survivors, a mere three days before my own double mastectomy, reconstruction, and sentinel node biopsy. It can’t be a simple coincidence...we are there!

Anyhoo…I’ve been chatting with this lovely lady for over a month now. She’s helped me create my own team to walk with me and to help raise money. She is coordinating our T-shirts and takes the time to answer all my questions, so we’ve spent some time communicating. However, I was really surprised to receive this email from her this morning:

“Mrs. Jones* will be filming a short video the morning of our walk. She was wondering if you would be interested in being filmed for the video. It's just to learn more about your story and why you are participating in the walk. I think you are perfect for this short film! If you are interested, what time would you be arriving at the walk? She can meet you and film before it begins. It won't take a lot of your time. Just let me know, thanks!” (* name has been changed)

A video interview sounds harmless, right? Why am I hesitant?

It’s because I don’t feel like my story needs to be in the video. Over the last few months, I have met some tough cookies. Women who were diagnosed with Stage 3, Stage 2, even Stage 4. These women’s stories need to be told. The story of a lady who was healthy when she accidentally discovered a lump in the shower and how that lump was Stage 3 breast cancer with positive lymph nodes. The stories of the women who didn’t have a choice between mastectomy or lumpectomy with high surveillance. What about the stories of all the women who can’t reconstruct their breasts yet because of the effects that radiation has had on their skin or the mom with 3 children who was expecting to wake up from surgery with new “foobs” only to be told that reconstruction was the least of her worries…..her breast cancer had metastasized? These women endure chemotherapy, radiation, and mastectomies and more times than not, they don’t have a lot of options.

I’m the lucky one so far. Because of the BRCA1+ gene, my doctors and I knew my risks years ago. I had the opportunity to have high surveillance. We were like the military….waiting for the enemy to cross those lines. When it did, we had a plan. I had a choice where most breast cancer patients don’t. Although the doctors felt like all the bad stuff was removed during my biopsies, I chose to continue with a bilateral mastectomy. I had other options; I could have done radiation and waited for cancer to strike again. As of now, chemo isn’t in my immediate future and neither are long radiation treatment schedules. And although that is subject to change depending on the sentinel node biopsy, right now….I have a choice.

These women’s stories that I mentioned? They need to be told because they are stories of true courage and strength. Cindy’s story. Michelle’s story. Jill’s story. Donna’s story.  These women are true inspirations and I am blessed to have met them all.  

I try to keep all these ladies’ in the forefronts of my mind when I start feeling overwhelmed or scared. I know they have been there, too. Our stories are all different, but the same. Could my story help impact another woman faced with these decisions? I’m not sure right now because I’m just trying to process all of this. I have to help empower myself to have the courage to go through with this surgery and wait for more biopsy results, which was one of the reasons I signed up for the walk. I just don’t know how to empower others when I feel like I’ve just begun this journey myself.

I'm sure that this organization will tell the stories of many Cindys, Michelles, Jills, and Donnas. And they should. I just don't know about sharing Amy's story.

I haven't responded to her yet.